Mama's Boy
by Yemi Hikari
Summary: Toshiro never liked the stigma of being different and never felt like being himself. There came a turning point when his and Rangiku's relationship changed and he felt he had to do something to improve the relationship. Thus he found himself stepping way out of his comfort zone and doing something that he felt people would laugh at... traditional dance. He was her student though.


_Disclaimer – I don't own Bleach. I've been double archiving my work over on Wattpadd and they had a fanfic contest, so I participated for the fun of it. This is one of the two one-shots I wrote. The other is "Trial"._

_**Mama's Boy**_

The small taicho of the tenth division leaned up against the wooden pillar that supported the stage the traditional dancers would be using that night at the festival. One small hand reached up to pull the front of his black kimono away from his skin which was sweaty due to the warm, humid weather that came with the summer. His zampaktuo spirit spoke in his head, the words Hyorinmaru choose being quite careful as to not agitate the white haired child genius. "_Are you sure young master that you want to do this."_

The boy let go of the front of his black kosode and let out a sigh. "_Of course I'm not sure of this Hyorinmaru._"

The boy carefully watched as some of the other Shinigami also dressed in their black kosode and hakama. One hand reached up to tug on the white haori that was emblazoned with the numeral ten on the back. The boy let out a deep sigh, the feeling of dread washing over him again as well as the nervous feeling about this evenings activity. One of the Shinigami pointed their finger at him. "Isn't that Hitsugaya Toshiro, the taicho of the tenth division?"

The young Shinigami felt his Adam's bob down as a particular thought crossed his mind. "_If you weren't dressed in the haori and thus identifiable as a captain then you wouldn't be treated with the respect you deserve despite being a child genius._" The boy reached up a nervous hand to wipe away the sweat from his cheek and took a deep breath. "_This is why I'm not sure of this... doing this I mean... I mean..._"

The white haired child closed his eyes and leaned his head back against the wooden support, his arms twisting around so that his small hands could grasp the other side. His dragon remained silent for a bit, but then the icy zampaktuo spirit spoke carefully in order to calm the child's anxieties. "_You are a very creative and very gifted person young master. You really shouldn't worry about what other people think._"

"_Yes... that's what granny always says. And Matsumoto. I can't help but think about what other people think. I want to be accepted and to belong._" The boy's bright teal eyes remained shut as he thought back to his early childhood, only to suddenly flinch as he remembered the jeers that had come his way from the other children that had included _monster_ and _beast_ as well as _hollow._ His eyes snapped open and he leaned forward a bit before starting to go for a walk to try and calm his nerves.

He stopped short though upon seeing his reflection in an old fashioned bucket that was still around Soul Society, his mouth twisting up into a frown. His arms were crossed and he tried not turning to look at the object of his loathing... his own self. Letting out a sigh his teal eyes drifted first to the ground and then a hand reached up and scratched his head. He then turned and leaned over the bucket to look at himself.

The reflection was that of a skinny child who couldn't keep as much weight on as he needed. Sometimes Toshiro felt as if he was masquerading as a taicho and not really one despite the fact he was the youngest to have learned bankai and did more work then the previous taicho. There was also those teal eyes that were cold and distant despite being of a bright vivid color as well as the icy locks of silvery white hair that cascaded down the side of his face.

He also couldn't help but notice that his facial features were more feminine then most males his age, something that upset him greatly. A thought crossed his mind and he found himself letting out a sigh at the same time. "_Men aren't supposed to be feminine at all._"

"_Then explain Yumichika._"

The boy stopped short, remembering the other male Shinigami who overflowed with feminine charm. This particular Shinigami was a member of the eleventh squad, a squad known for pretty much being about masculinity. "_I guess I could go and speak with that man._" The boy stood up straight and brushed back a lock of silvery-white hair and felt for the man's reiatsu. Upon finding the pretense near by he stepped over and called the person out by their last name. "Ayasegawa."

Yumichika looked up from where he was speaking with his bald friend of the same division Madarame Ikakku. "Hitsugaya Taicho... do you need something?"

"I have a question for you and I would appreciate if you would answer it."

Yumichika raised a disinterested eyebrow. "And what might this question be? If it is to go on a mission the answer is no, because I have enough work backed up."

"No. Is it all right for men... for males to have feminine traits?"

Yumichika's mouth opened from the surprise of being asked such a question, almost as if he wasn't sure whether to be insulted or not. It was Ikakku who held up his thumb. "A man is not a man if he can not accept his feminine traits."

Toshiro's posture suddenly straightened upon hearing this while Yumichika turned towards his bald headed friend. "And what Ikkaku are your feminine traits?"

"A fine shaved head that shines like the moon." Ikkaku continued to hold his thumb up. Toshiro felt his posture falter.

Yumichika let out a sigh. "That's not really feminine Ikakku."

"Fine then... the beauty to my fighting style."

"Well... I won't argue that your fighting style isn't beautiful, but it really isn't masculine either. It's more... handsome then beautiful."

Toshiro folded his arms. "I really need an answer to the question. I need to decide if I'm going to..." The boy paused for a few minutes. He turned his head away as his cheeks flushed up.

Yumichika blinked a couple of times. "What are you doing?"

The boy opened his mouth a few times like a fish before finally giving in. "I am going to be one of the ones performing the traditional dance tonight."

The darker haired Shinigami's eyebrow rose up. "Oh? Are you doing this for yourself?" Toshiro froze, the fear and anxiety he had been feeling squeezing now at his lungs. "Seriously, if you aren't doing this for yourself, then what is the point?"

"Never mind. Forget I asked or even mentioned this." The boy slipped away then, the sticky feeling not going away and causing him to wish the weather was cooler. He choose to head to where he would be expected to go to change. The outfit he had planned on using for his dance was there on a small table. To his distaste there was also a mirror and he found himself sitting down in the chair looking at the item.

His zampkatuo of course had something to say about the whole thing. "_You told them that you would be doing the preparations all by yourself, which means you'll need the mirror for the makeup and hair. Also... you know that Soul Society is catching up with the modern world._" The boy let out a sigh, before shaking his head and leaning on the table to avoid looking at his own face. The dragon zampkatuo of course was worried. "_Young master... I ask again if this is a good idea. Do you really want to do this. You hate your own face, so how can you apply your own makeup for the dance._"

"I don't know. I honestly don't know." The boy continued to lean on his elbows not hearing the cloth door open. "I want to do this for her Hyorinmaru. I've got to do this for her."

A knock caused him to jump up, knocking the chair down. He turned to see that Yumichika was standing in the doorway looking at him. The boy swallowed and looked at the ground, his hands quickly going behind his back. He then shuffled his foot and hurried to upright the chair, his hands gripping the back. He let out a cough to try and clear away his anxiety as his bright teal eyes continued to stare at the ground.

"Ikkaku says I was to hard on you."

"I don't know if you were or weren't." Toshiro piped up as he continued to look at the ground.

"I guess the first question I have to ask is how did you come to learn Japanese dance. This is honestly the first time I've heard of it. While I can imagine you of all people learning by mimicking what you see, I doubt you would actually try and perform something like this unless you had an actual teacher refining your technique. Who is your teacher?"

"Matsumoto..." The boy continued to look at the ground.

"Her? Your fukutaicho? Well... that isn't really surprising and was honestly my first guess. My next question is whether she knows you're doing this or not." Toshiro opened his mouth, but it clamped shut. Instead he found himself shaking his head as he continued to look down. Yumichika let out a sigh. "Please tell me that you're not doing this for her."

The white haired child's head darted up. "What's wrong with me doing this for her?"

Yumichika frowned. "Why are you doing this for her though? Honestly... you're going so far as to take on a feminine role despite the fact you're terrified of being made fun of for dressing like a girl." The man watched Toshiro swallow. "Come on. Why? You're not romantically attracted to her, so what is it?"

"Of course I'm not romantically attracted to her!" Toshiro's mouth twisted up into a frown, the idea causing his stomach to not feel well. He then paused, his bright teal eyes widening in horror. His head darted down. "Look... if it weren't for Matsumoto I would never have entered the academy and I'd likely be out on the streets fending for myself."

The room became silent for a short period of time. Yumichika let out a sigh and the boy's eyes darted up slightly to see the man scratching his head. "Yeah... sure... that's the reason. What are you hiding?"

The boy's breath caught and he looked at the man in horror. After a few minutes of the fifth seat of the eleventh division staring at him with his arms crossed Toshiro found himself suddenly sitting down and his feet crossing together and his hands clenching the side. He didn't hear the man approach him until he heard and felt the chair turning so that he would have to look in the mirror at himself. His eyes had begun to look up, only to flinch at catching sight of the mirror. They darted back down.

He head the fifth seat sigh. "How do you expect to do the makeup and hair part when you can't look in the mirror?" The man paused, letting go of the chair. "I never thought you of all people would hate the way you look. I always forget the ugly faces, but yours is one that I will never forget."

The boy's bright teal eyes blinked a couple of times. "_He never forgets a face that isn't ugly? Then.._" The boy's mouth opened. "Then did you forget his face."

"His face?" Yumichika's eyebrow went up. "Whose face?"

"You know... he's teal eyes like mine, but of a pale almost washed out color. He's also got silver hair like me, but darker and not a white silver, and if you asked anyone else they would say he's an ugly..." Toshiro caught himself before saying the bad word.

"I don't know of anyone who..." Yumichika shook his head. "I told you. I don't remember ugly faces. Who are you talking about?"

Toshiro rubbed his lower lip against his top set of teeth. "Ichimaru Gin."

"No... he's not ugly. Far from it. He's got a..." The man stopped short as if something hit him. "Hold on. Let me go and get a chair for myself. Standing is such a tire." The boy shook his head, thinking this was a way for the man to escape, only to hear another chair scrapping the ground near him a few minutes later. The boy looked up to see the man sitting backwards and leaning against the top of the chair. "So..."

"Nothing." The boy looked at the ground, his shoulders tensing as he hoped the man would simply go away.

Yumichika finally choose to speak up himself. "You know... people call Ichimaru Gin ugly not because he had an ugly face, but because of what he did."

"And how is that supposed to help me?"

"I find it interesting that you described Ichimaru as having similar hair and eye color of yours. Last time I checked Ukitake Taicho also has a similar hair and eye color as you do. Why that mess up instead?"

"Because..." Toshiro tilted his head to look at Yumichika. "Child genius, anti-social behavior, not able to make friends, stubborn as a mule... who does that describe."

The man narrowed his eyes out of boredom. "Shiba Kaien."

"Yeah... at least two of those things don't describe him. Add in the silver hair and teal eyes... who do you have."

"It's not as if the two of you are blood related. If people are making comments ignore them." Yumichika looked at his nails in a bored fashion. He then paused upon realizing that the small taicho had remained silent and saw two bright teal eyes glaring at him and a mouth twisted up in irritation. The man's hand was bent in the position he had it in to look at his finger's. "Come on. How could you possibly know that you're related. It's practically impossible. It's coincidence."

"_Most people would think that despite the fact you're paranoid that others would think that otherwise._" The small taicho's zampaktuo chided.

Toshiro took a deep breath but kept his mouth shut. Yumichika folded his arms across his chest. "Now you're getting annoying. I thought you died on a plain of ice and came to soul society, that you weren't born here. Everyone knows that Ichimaru Gin has been here over a hundred years as has Matsumoto Rangiku. You've only been here... well, since you died."

"And when was that?" Toshiro glared at the man.

"Shouldn't you know that? I mean, if you don't know the date you died and came to Soul Society, how can you know that you died on a plain of ice?"

"My _inner world_ is a plain of ice."

Dead silence filled the room while Yumichika took this statement in. "So... are you worried that people will think that you lied about dying and coming to Soul Society?"

"You certainly are dense, aren't you?" There came no response so Toshiro continued, his mood lightening as he waved his hand. "I didn't lie about it because that was honestly what I believed."

"Come on. Even if you didn't, how could you know that they're you're parents?"

"Because I remember Ichimaru."

Yumichika paused. "Yeah... and Matsumoto-san didn't say anything about this?"

"_Matsumoto_ didn't remember until recently." The boy snapped. "_Matsumoto_ avoids the subject except for the one time we've talked about it." Toshiro then paused. "Ayasegawa... do you think Matsumoto would rather I have been born a girl or have hadn't been born with any feminine traits?" The man paused, staring at the boy as he was not sure what to say. The boy continued. "Or does she simply wished that I had been born a girl so that she doesn't have to look at the spitting image of him every day?"

There came a silence. Yumichika could see that the boy was quite upset about all of this. He then carefully spoke. "The first thing I'm going to say is that you're not the spitting image of Ichimaru Gin. Only an idiot who has no eye for aesthetics would think that." The man paused as the boy's eyebrow twitched. "Or in your case someone whose got terrible self-esteem issues." The man took a deep breath. "You may have that man's coloring Hitsugaya Taicho, but you have your mother's facial features and body structure."

"Is that a good thing? Doesn't she want me to be a girl or to look more like a boy."

The man felt his eyebrow twitch. "Look... if Matsumoto has a problem with you being born a boy with feminine traits then tell her to take it up with me. I honestly don't think she has a problem with your feminine traits though. Or wishes you were born a girl."

"Yeah... then why did she used to always try and take me shopping for clothes just like mothers would do with their daughters."

Yumichika paused, his hand up in the air. Letting out a sigh he set it down with the other on the chair back. "What's wrong with guys enjoying clothes shopping?"

"I didn't say that! I honestly enjoy doing it for her... when she isn't... well, saying embarrassing things. I mean... the things we do together are things you expect girls to do with their moms, not what you expect guys to do with their moms."

The two stared at each other for awhile before the older male spoke again. "I think you're lucky. Most moms don't let their sons explore their feminine side." There came another pause. "I think the reason she's avoiding the subject is because she feels guilty for abandoning you."

"She didn't abandon me."

"Really?"

"She lost her memories. That isn't her fault."

Yumichika watched the boy. "While it is nice that you see it that way, that isn't how society sees it."

"Ichimaru's the one who took me away from her! He thought... I honestly don't know what that man was thinking. I just know she lost her memories for some reason, forgot she had a child and Ichimaru took me away instead of telling her she did have one."

"Hitsugaya Taicho..." Yumichika's fingers tapped at the chair frame, his teeth biting at his lower lip. "I get what you're saying. And I honestly won't accuse Matsumoto of abandoning you."

"She knew I was in trouble in the Rukongai and found me."

"I told you... you don't need to convince me." The man jerked his head away in irritation. "What I'm telling you is how society is going to label her when this comes out and how she is labeling herself because of there preconceived notions." The man paused. "You know... you get that from her. Not him. This..." Yumichika waved his hand in the air. "This worry about being accepted for what you're really are and not for some fake personification that others place on you."

"And how does this help me?"

"I don't know. I didn't exactly expect this conversation to take this particular turn." The man narrowed his eyes. "Hitsugaya Taicho... can I ask why you're doing this again?"

"I guess I have to say that its for her... and in part for myself. Matsumoto taught me traditional dance in secret. She started before I even became a taicho. I feel like there is something I need to find."

"You're worried though how certain people will perceive this, aren't you?"

"I do feminine things and the woman's society says I'm cute."

"This is the woman's society we're talking about. Oh never mind. Don't worry about how people perceive you. Do you see me worrying about how people perceive me?"

"Says the biggest narcissist of the Gotei Thirteen."

"Touche..." Yumichka felt his cheek twitch. He paused. "What about Ukitake and Kyoraku Taicho, or even Kuchiki Taicho?"

"That doesn't change the fact I'm worried about how people will perceptive me because of this. I'm doing this despite the fact I think Abarai and others are going to call me a sissy because I told myself I'm doing it for Matsumoto."

"I see..." The man folded his arms. "Fine. Looks like I came here to talk you back into doing it for nothing." The man looked at the mirror, frowning as he did so. "Still... are you really going to do all of this yourself. You hate looking at yourself in the mirror."

"It's not as if I have anyone to help. This is supposed to be a surprise for Matsumoto. I told her the time to meet me and she got all excited because I was willing to... 'have fun at the festival' ...as she put it."

"So I'm out of the question to help?"

"You're not the type of person to go out of your way to help people even in this kind of situation."

Yumichika's mouth twitched. "Well... I am offering to help."

Two bright teal eyes blinked a couple of times.

**M**

Matsumoto Rangiku was worried. Her small taicho had told her that he planned on meeting her at a certain spot at the festival and she couldn't see him anywhere. She had even brought a less formal outfit for the child taicho to change into as she had the feeling he would just wear his Shinigami uniform. Her heart ached because he couldn't _be_ a child. Of course, he hadn't shown up and she was beginning to wonder if he'd gotten caught up with their division paperwork again.

She stood at the back looking at the stage when someone called out to her. "Hey! Rangiku!"

The woman looked up to see the fukutaicho of the ninth waving at her. "Ah! Shuhei! I see you're with Kira, Momo and Renji tonight."

"Did you come to see the traditional dances?" Momo bent forward, supporting herself with her knees.

"No... well... I'm not sure what taicho's plans are." Out of the corner of her eye she saw Shuhei's face falter. "He hasn't shown though. I'm not sure if I should go."

"At least stay and enjoy the dances." Renji smirked at her while holding his hand behind his head.

"I didn't know you liked Japanese dance." Rangiku let out a laugh.

"Yeah... despite being of the eleventh division I do have an appreciation for this kind of thing."

"Still... I'm not sure I'll be staying."

"Really? I never thought I'd see the day you'd miss a Japanese dance function on purpose."

Rangiku felt herself bristle before she turned to look at the man and his bald headed friend. "Good evening to you."

Yumichika ignored her acid tone before going and sitting on a fence waving his traditional fan in his face. Ikkaku leaned against the fence. "You'll want to stay Rangiku-san."

"Taicho said he would be here and I'm worried I have to go and drag him away from his desk."

"I saw him around. He said you'll see him shortly, so not to worry." The fifth seat of the eleventh division fanned himself some more.

Rangiku let out a deep sigh before shaking her head. "Fine. I hope he's telling me the truth."

"Oh... he is." Yumichika spoke into his fan.

The woman leaned up against the fence and watched the first couple of dances, her usual enthusiasm not there. It was then that a young dancer dressed in an icy dark blue kimono and ornaments came out and began to dance. Rangiku blinked a couple of times while the corners of Renji's mouth twisted up in amusement. He let out a laugh. "Eh... who would have thought."

Shuhei frowned. "That girl looks familiar, but I'm having problems placing her."

Rangiku swallowed, her hands reaching out to clench her arms. Momo on the other hand continued to lean forward with her palms. "You know... that girl is real cute."

Renji let out a snicker. "Guys... that girl is actually a guy."

Momo blinked a couple of times. "How do you know?"

Shuhei though drew his breath, his face having turned pale. Kira of course had a frown on their face. Both looked at Rangiku to see whether she was displeased with this or not. Shuhei finally rubbed the back of his head. "Rangiku-san... exactly how do you feel about... well... him doing this."

"She should be proud of him. We all should." Renji piped up."

"Here, here!" Ikkaku raised his fist into the air. Yumichika of course said nothing.

Rangiku turned to the man as he flapped the fan in front of his face. "Did _you_ know about _this?_"

"Yes. I did know. Not until today mind you. I helped him with putting the outfit on." The man stopped flapping his fan in front of his face. "Do you have a problem with what he's done? I told him that if you did I would have some choice words for you. You should know as well as I that the dance he's doing is traditionally done by males and females, but mostly males."

Momo blinked a couple of times. "I didn't know that." She then blinked a couple of times. "Wait... everyone seems to know who the dancer is except me."

Kira cleared his thought. "Hinamori... who do you know who is male with white hair around that age."

"Only..." The small female made to yell out the name she happened upon, only to find her mouth covered by Renji and Kira.

"Shush! Don't interrupt the dance!"

Momo pushed her hand away. "But Shiro-chan... he'd never do something like this."

The dance ended and Rangiku let out a sigh of relief. She started around the crowd so that she could get to where the dancers would be leaving and entering the stage. Yumichika and Ikkaku followed after her. The darker haired companion continued to flap his fan. "You didn't answer me whether you had a problem with this."

"I..." Rangiku shook her head. "I have a problem with the fact he wasn't honest with me. He could have just told me."

"He wanted it to be a surprise." This statement from Yumichika caused her to stop short.

The orange haired woman blinked a couple of times. "What exactly has taicho told you?"

"A lot of his insecurities. Things he felt I would understand."

Ikkaku looked at his friend. "Why would he think that?"

"Because I don't let the way people may see me get in the way of myself being who I am."

Rangiku shook her head before going on and came to the small area that her taicho had been using for changing. His reiatsu was flaring, going up and down. The woman pulled open the curtain and saw the boy in disarray. "Makeup off first, then hair ornaments and _then_ the kimono!"

The kimono in question was off one shoulder and the white haired child blinked at the woman with bright teal eyes. "Matsumoto!"

"Don't Matsumoto me!" The woman moved forward and opened up the makeup kit to get out the remover. She then proceeded to remove the makeup. "This is my makeup kit, isn't it?"

"Are you mad at me?" The boy flinched, one eye closed as she worked the makeup of his face."

"I'm mad that you didn't tell me."

"It was supposed to be a surprise." Toshiro grumbled, his voice cracking as he did so. "And you don't have a problem with my borrowing your makeup kit when I need to cover bruises from training."

"Someone told me. If I'd known I could have gotten you your own. It's better to have your own."

"It's a one time thing." The boy pulled away. "Matsumoto..." The woman however continued to fuss at him, the outfit she had brought him dropped on the floor. The boy's voice softened. "Ka-chan... haha..." His tongue twisted as he tried to find the right words and the woman stopped short upon hearing him say this. "Mama... please stop fussing."

Rangiku of course did stop. "Toshiro... I don't deserve to be called that."

"Someone explained why."

"He did, did he." The woman turned to glare at the man.

"I want to call you..." The boy paused. "...something other then Matsumoto."

A hand reached up to brush the hair, taking a comb from it that had kept the long strands away from his eyes. His silvery white hair cascaded down so that his left eye was slightly covered and she brushed it away so she could see it. She opened her mouth to say something, only to have someone speak."

"Shiro-chan!"

"It's Hitsugaya Taicho to you Hinamori!"

"What do you think you're doing?" The small female fukutaicho of the fifth division glared at him.

Renji peeked his head around the corner. "An awesome job..." The red heads words were cut short when the small white haired taicho ducked behind Rangiku. This caused the fukutaicho of the sixth to frown. "I was only saying you did a good job. Not going to make fun of you. That... and I came to drag Momo-chan back with me."

"But he..." Momo found herself interrupted by Yumichika.

"There is nothing wrong with what he did Hinamori Fukutaicho. He's being himself for once and using the creative side he was gifted with."

"I... you were very cute Shiro-chan."

Toshiro's cheeks suddenly flared up. "Stupid Bedwetter Momo!"

Momo let out a squeak only to have Renji grab her by the back of her clothing and drag her away. Rangiku finished working at the makeup. "Taicho... you want to go around the rest of the festival with me." The woman reached down and brushed off the outfit she had brought.

The boy blinked a couple of times. "Yes.. but what about these things."

Yumichika waved his hand. "I can take them back to the tenth."

"And I can make sure he doesn't play with them." Ikkaku's comment caused Yumichika's smile to faulter.

Toshiro paused for a few more minutes. "You didn't want me to be born a girl did you?"

"Of course not! You're my beautiful baby boy! Though not a baby anymore of course!"

_Note – I know there are some people who may go "eww" at the idea of guys dressing up in what society deems as feminine clothing. There are certain traditional dances that are done by men, ones that are done by females and those that are done by both. _


End file.
